To those of you who still think saying “grow up, nobody’s gonna kiss your scars” is somehow more mature and classy than saying “you look like you’re seriously hurting, how can I help?”
What wisdom do you seriously think you’re imparting. I mean, do you really think you’re somehow privy to a darker truth that the rest of us are blind to?
I mean, you wanna know what I hate? I hate when people act superior than others. I hate when they assume they know everything about a subject and that they’re the smartest fucking kid in the room because for some reason being cynical and snappy is seen as being intelligent and well-rounded.
Guess what, friend. You’re not Sherlock Holmes. I already know all that shit. Do you really think that I have been cutting myself since I was thirteen and not once thought “gee, this is probably going to be an issue if I want some sort of intimacy.” Do you really think I tied a noose around my throat and said, “This is going to be a great story for a party! I can’t wait until everybody pities me.” Do you really honestly believe that with the amount of times I say “I’m a fucking piece of shit” I don’t already know that’s what other people think.
I just wanna know real quick what you get out of crushing people’s one last hope like does it feel good to say “nobody will love you until you learn to love yourself” to people who physically cannot do that I mean you just told them that nobody loves them right now you just said “you hate yourself no wonder everyone hates you” like is it really so bad that some people need support structures in order to get out I mean if a kid is having difficulty in math you say “I can stay after and tutor” but god forbid he wants to kill himself suddenly it’s “welcome to the real world, loser.”
Does it feel good telling someone who fell down “I hope you know nobody finds gritty skinned palms attractive,” does it feel good to refuse to help them up again, does it feel good kicking sand in their eyes, does it feel good being righteous and cruel and a complete stranger to their pain, adding insult to injury and demanding praise for your free advice that nobody asked you for and we all already knew anyway. I hope it feels great. I hope you think you’re high and holy, I hope you never learn what it’s like to have someone tell you “Your mental state is your own fault and on top of that, it’s why you’ll never find love.”
I mean if you got out of here and learned to love yourself all on your own, I’m proud of you. But does it really make you feel special to step in the faces of the ones who need help? Like do you really have to say “I did it stop complaining, dear” instead of saying “I did so I know it’s hard when you need me I am here.”
You know what I don’t get? I don’t get that you can break a leg and sure while some people will force themselves to standing, most people need an ambulance and everyone’s cool with that. You can get sick and yeah you can handle it by yourself but it sucks less with someone else - but no, the minute someone asks for mental help, suddenly they’re told, “You don’t need anybody’s hand to hold.”
Look, I literally don’t care if they romanticize mud. I don’t care if they dedicate four whole pages of their journal to signing a boy’s last name attached to their initials. I don’t care if they need to obsess over things that seem dumb to me, because I understand that everyone works differently. If what’s keeping them tethered to this world is the idea of living over a coffee shop with four of their best friends, more power to them. If it takes believing that one day they’ll be famous and living free in order to get them to the point they’re well past their teens and they’re strong enough to conquer their darkness on their own: I don’t care. Their dreams are their home. I don’t care if they think flower crowns are the world’s last delight.
I don’t care so long as it keeps them alive."